An Unexplored Heart
He tried his best not to look at her during class.
Although had a few crushes growing up,
he let himself wander around in the feelings,
his apprehension keeping him at bay.
He found it difficult to speak to her and wasn’t sure if it was fear or what.
Everything was so far away, he felt.
He looked again at her;
her eyes glancing around, this time he caught her eye.
In that moment, he thought he knew something,
but he didn’t know what it meant, or just another figment of his imagination.
He always got the two confused.
She smiled and went back to work.
What did she think of that note he left her?
He smiled as he remembered her eyes glancing around the hall
with a smile on her face.
His heart, once again sank down into the depths of his stomach.
He couldn’t speak, his heart once again drowned in the darkness
Of his subconscious.
He left it at that and went back to work.
A Light Memory
Mother’s gone now.
Was it past due or too soon?
He knew everyone leaves some time or another,
but that didn’t stop him from wondering how he was suppose to feel.
He felt a relief of emotions and clarity, although he loves her.
He felt an emptiness, although he knew she would always be close.
Yet these comforts did not bring warmth to his soul’s yearning to see her once again.
Looking through the old albums of childhood, pictures placed with caring hands,
taken by her loving yet soiled soul, such as he had known too well,
he kept that watchful eye over his own soul, such as she had never known.
The single memory of being rocked and sung to, broke through memories
laced with thoughtless words and emotional tenses of active submission
to powers of fearful control.
He smiled as he closed the picture book of his mind and in his hands,
she would say, that he had to look for a silver lining, a quiver of light through the clouds.
“Why?” he would ask. “How does that help me?”
“It’s a reminder.” She would say. “It reminds us that the sun always shines.”